VISION FOR ALL

Rahul Kumar

275 Posts

32 comments

Reader Blogs are not moderated, Jagran is not responsible for the views, opinions and content posted by the readers.
blogid : 8093 postid : 12

CORRUPTION HAS KILLED ME

Posted On: 5 Jan, 2012 Others में

  • SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Corruption has killed me. I have been killed. I can take breath.But, I am a death body.My emotion has been killed. My psychology has been killed. My self-respect has been killed. I have remained alone but I will kill myself because my everything has been killed.
How much I had to face psychological and cardiological problems due to that objection and oppressions? I was being oppressed. A small boy was being oppressed due to me. So when I was awaking then my mind was in terrible figure. When I was sleeping then my mind was in terrible dream. I was observing terrible dream of my mistaking also because I was being objected for his oppression also, besides that wrong objection of unnatural relationship. But I never seen any sorts of bad dream of unnatural activities because I was not going on that way. I have seen him in dream only for two times since last 9 months. One day, he was weeping and another day, he was reading .I had observed his weeping for approx 50 times due to oppressions. So I observed his weeping in dream.He used to read additional books always. So I observed his reading in dream. Why I haven’t observed any wrong thing in dream? Why I observed terrible figure in dream in place of bad figure?Why it’s so?It’s so because I am not wrong.

I have believed that justice will be not provided so during sleeping now i see dream related to my death.Now my mind thinks about death during sleeping.

My memory power has become so weak due to depression. Even, what I have eaten today, I forget.
There was the lack of practical skill due to depression. No sensitivity remained due to depression. I started to walk without concentrating mind and sometimes automatically. There was the toughness and glittering of mind. I was feeling like as electric current in my mind .My mind was thinking about that all happening during sleeping. This is right that my mind was thinking earlier also about my philosophy during sleeping.But now this was in extensive form.Now my mind starts to think automatically when i go for sleep but remains in half-consciousness position before sleeping and think automatically.This time also one must have the controll to his mind .It was the time when my mind started work to the level of half only and i had forgotten my half knowledge and history.Due to depression,when i slept,i remained slept within 24 hours.When i awaked,i remained awaked within 24 hours. 
Depression created cardiological problems. I felt problems in breathing. I was suffering from some practical phobias. My heart beat remained fast for 2-3 times within 24 hours and for 1-2 hours.
Due to less eating since April to Sept, I had to be sufferer of continous body pain along with memory weakness. For 3-4 times, I had to be sufferer of fever of about 101 degree F. Due to problems created by weakness, one day everyone had to be fearful.
I have faced so many problems also.It is right that my heart beat started to be so fast also when he was oppressed in front of me and due to me. I was become depressed. I never took a medicine of one paisa by the School Dispensary, but after going from School on 3 April 2011,I had to take medicines for all these problems.
This time also, I have many problems. My memory power is becoming weak and weak. Sometimes, my mind pains slightly.I am not talking about headache.This time i loss the ability to realise and think properly.Sometimes during sleeping and always during half-sleeping condition,my mind remains in non-consciousness position.This was earlier also but now this is more. I am not talking about the faintness.This non-consciosness position is the consequence of loss of sensation.Nothing can be decided by me during half-sleeping condition of non-consciosness. Sometimes, It feels that I am listening first time about this thing or listening after a long interval of time. But I remains well-known about that.Whatever the dreams are seen by me,it persists real during sleeping and after sleeping also,it persists for certain interval of time.Whetever the reals,sometimes persist dream.Figures created in my mind persist happening in front of me for sometimes.

Sometimes,i see coming figure before happening for very short time.This is happening from when,when i was very little.There was the reverberation of words  in my mind.Many words started to reverberate frequently.
Sanjeev’s mother was saying-”Sanjeev has allergy from me.”Sanjeev will be lunatic if he will live with me.She will withdraw him.”Such so many sentences started to reverberate.
Sanjeev was himself saying-”If  any parents will know about this torturing-the torturing of those boys-,they will not admitt their children.So there was the terror situation for Sanjeev.So due to this also, after informing about this on 8 March with his one neighbour of class 8,he didn’t inform later.After the all round conspiracy of 8 March and my torturing of 7 March night by a teacher,he was replying later-”what was happening on 8 March.”
This was the major reason of his depression.When on 25 March,one teacher was admiring me in class,who was involved in conspiracy,i informed him about this admiring,he became emotinal and started to say-”it feels as if he has accepted his mistakes.” Why he was saying so? He was saying so because he had problems from those persons,but from me.One day he was saying-”Uselessly,i have come in this school.My home was better because i was not teased  and so on.”
Why he was saying in this manner.Even i was not saying-”Uselessly,i have come in this school.”
 
Due to depression,sometimes it  feels in my mind that someting like poison is effecting my mind slightly.Principal trappem me by his mind-created idea-I was in the regular practise to sleep with him by going to his room after midnight.Now this thing is reverberating in my mind.Because i was not wrong,so this is reverberating.
 
 But who can understand me? How a principal become so blind? I have seen the supplementary effect of corruption.At the night of 7 March 2011,when I was informing some teachers about torturing,they were not believing but mentally torturing me due to some reasons-which was originated due to the bad politics of them. This bad politics of prestige has been created due to corruption.
Corruption had made principal blind. On 14 sept 2011,principal objected me with Sanjeev for sleeping but remained unjustified.Inspite of this,principal expelled me due to going against him.But he wanted to object me for his mentally torturing also. So principal asked him about his problems.So he said about the torturing of those boys.But principal ignored and asked again-By what medium,his mother became convinced about this.On 8 March 2011,principal had been informed about this.Sanjeev himself and his one neighbour of class 8 informed his mother about torturing on 8 March when she came by the misleadership of a teacher.Sanjeev was being teased still.So at least when I was objected,on that condition principal must try to stop teasing.
Due to fear created by corruption,Rupa Publications and Oxford University Press has rejected my proposal for the publication of my book-‘’A Brief Future Of The Time.’’

Rupa Publications replied as:-
Dear Sir,

Thank you for submitting your proposal to Rupa publications.

We really appreciate getting a chance to consider your proposal , and while
there truly is some great writing here, we are afraid we can’t find a spot
for it on our list.

We wish you every success in your future endeavour.

Warm regards,

Shalini

Why afraid?This is not afraid.This is phobia.

Oxford University Press replied as:-
Dear Mr Kumar,
Thank you for approaching Oxford University Press with your work.
Regretfully, the proposal falls outside the scope of our current
publishing programme. In view of this, we regret we are unable to
consider your work for publication.
We thank you nevertheless for giving us an opportunity to consider it
and wish you success with a suitable publisher.
Best wishes,
Academic Division
””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””
”””””””””””
Oxford University Press
1st Floor, YMCA Library Building
1 Jai Singh Road
New Delhi 110001
Phone: 43600300, 23747124/ 25
Fax: 91 11 23360897
e mail: acad.in@oup.com
visit us at www.oup.co.in

Why my philosophy is bond under the current scope of publishing programme.Because,this is a new philosophy for the sustainability of the future.This is helpful for make our scope current.
Corruption seized my best friend by creating conspiracy and trapping. He was my best person also.Now corruption is seizing my writing.But I have no any problem from the seizing of my writing. I have problem because I have been trapped with my best person, but I myself was oppressed.I can tolerate everthng,every objection but i can’t tolerate this objection.If someone will impose the objection of murder on me and it will be proved falsely,i will tolerate.But i can’t tolerate this.

Depression was in the origin of every thing.
Now i have reached on that ondition where only one word against me can increase my problems.I want to commit suicide.But i am under control.But any word against me make me out of contol.This happens because i am depressed due to that reason but saying against me at present time increase my depression.Same thing was happening with Sanjeev after 8 March 2011.Due to the overall happenings,he was depressed on that manner.So any word said against him by me became the cause of increasement in his problems.So on 29 March 2011,when he was saying me on telephone that he was unknown when he would come.He was unknown why he would not come.I became fearful by listening these statements of Sanjeev because he was already depressed and now he was not liking to come school.So i asked the reason by SMS.Due to my SMS,his mother became doubtful.So pressure came to Sanjeev and he had to say against me.But didn’t say anything about sleeping.Due to fear,he had to say everything in some exaggerated form.Also,his recent psychology was working.So he said that at the night of sience examination,i caught him till 8:30 P:M.Due to fear,he had to say so because i didn’t catch and remained till 7 P:M-only for 45 minutes.There was one reality behind this thing was Sanjeev’s phobiatic nature also.Going to roof has created phobia for him because he had fear that any teacher would see him with me.So he said in his statement to his mother that a teacher caught this incident.In fact,he had become the sufferer of phobia to teacher. That system had reached Sanjeev on that condition where he could be the sufferer of phobia,as i become excited to commit suicide this time.He said that it was the night of science exam but it was the night of hindi exam.Because science exam was on 25 March but it was 22 March.He was so fearful by the result of science so this thing pressurised him to say about this due to fear.Due to his depression,he desired only to a little extent to sit on my bed.But he had to sit due to me.This thing was like as bondation for Sanjeev on that time due to his depression and phobia.So he said that i used to catch him for 2-3 hours to sit on my bed.But he himself used to sit.His feeling of bondation bondaged Sanjeev to say so.Due to his phobia and depression,his thinking capability lost sometimes.So he became misleaded by some those boys and said his mother that i was catching him by running when he was going far away from me by running.
 

 

This time If i will have to commit suicide,i will write against my family member also.Even against Sanjeev also.Because i am depressed on that way where i can claimed that one also who can be right.Because my depression can’t compromise with anyone.Same thing was happening with Sanjeev.But after 3 months,he had forgot everything.So when principal asked about his problems from me,he said that i used to sit him on my bed by touching his hand but he had sitten on my bed.On that time,he had no pressure and fear by principal and no phobia but he had to say because he had said in front of his mother earlier.So on 14 Sept 2011,when principal asked about his problem,he referred to the torturing of those boys.On that time,there was no pressure,fear and phobia related to these matters.There was only pressure and fear related to sleeping.

No matter is that Sanjeev said against me due to his problems from me but due to his phobias,depressions and under pressure due to fear.The matter is that if my small behavior can create problems for Sanjeev due to his phobias and depressions and in this way he had to say about these in front of his mother under the pressure and due to fear.Why Sanjeev will not say about the something wrong happening during sleeping because this would create phobias and depressions for Sanjeev because he was psychologically attracted to Harry Potter not to any homosexual or sxual novel. His phobias and depressions would motivate him to say so but he said nothing against sleeping.This can be possible only when there will be nothing during sleeping.Even there was pressure and fear related to sleeping only.

 

 

 Principal referred to the written complain of his mother but principal himself was working as lawyer and judge.His mother must be lawyer and principal must be only judge.I have right to protection,so i must be provided opportunity to keep my favour against the objection of sleeping in front of his mother.This right can’t be suppressed by principal.Everything must be proved according to that written complain and his mother must be the lawyer.But principal proved wrongly according to his mind-composed idea,which will be not described on that written complain.

 

 

 

 

 

 

No matter is that Sanjeev said against me due to his problems from me but due to his phobias,depressions and under pressure due to fear.The matter is that if my small behavior can create problems for Sanjeev due to his phobias and depressions and in this way he had to say about these in front of his mother under the pressure and due to fear.Why Sanjeev will not say about the something wrong happening during sleeping because this would create phobias and depressions for Sanjeev because he was psychologically attracted to Harry Potter not to any homosexual or sxual novel. His phobias and depressions would motivate him to say so but he said nothing against sleeping.This can be possible only when there will be nothing during sleeping.Even there was pressure and fear related to sleeping only.

| NEXT

Rate this Article:

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
Loading ... Loading ...

1 प्रतिक्रिया

  • SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend

Post a Comment

CAPTCHA Image
*

Reset

नवीनतम प्रतिक्रियाएंLatest Comments

nancy4vaye के द्वारा
February 27, 2012

नमस्ते प्रिय! मेरा नाम नैन्सी है, मैं अपनी प्रोफ़ाइल को देखा और अगर आप कर रहे हैं आप के साथ संपर्क में प्राप्त करना चाहते मुझ में भी दिलचस्पी तो कृपया मुझे एक संदेश जितनी जल्दी भेजें। (nancy_0×4@hotmail.com) नमस्ते नैन्सी ***************************** Hello Dear! My name is Nancy, I saw your profile and would like to get in touch with you If you’re interested in me too then please send me a message as quickly as possible. (nancy_0×4@hotmail.com) Greetings Nancy


topic of the week



latest from jagran